Potty about Potter?

I was asked by my editor for a Harry Potter picture for illustration to coincide with the release of the new book. J K Rowling official website
Couldn't be fagged to go to the local shop and queue from midnight so concocted a little something at home. Borrowed the books from the kiddies next door, got my Angel Cards out ... the card with the horse denoting 'Victory' just flew into my hand ... taps side of nose ... thank you, Angels ... and lit a few candles. I rather like this pic. Was praying I didn't set fire to anything, didn't think the insurance company would stand another claim from me so soon!!

By hook or by crook I'll get this picture posted!!! Obviously there was a glitch with inserting the photo in the post .. technology is wonderful when it works. The artist, one Mr Chapman, apparently dashes these off in 10 minutes. Wouldn't it be lovely to have that talent and ability? No, it's not the Blackpool Tower!! 

The mailman cometh

Got a lovely postcard this morning, from Scotland ... sadly it isn't for me ... I know you're not supposed to read someone else's mail but it IS a postcard! Apparently 'Olds' has got a taste for lager now! It's addressed to my house number but I don't recognise the names of the occupants ... hold hard, Moriarty ... the bottom line of the address "(The house with the red door and porch)" ... OK, I'll nip along and put it thro the box. I expect the posman has to deliver to the designated number cos I've got a blue door! Been a bit quiet on the posting front .. had a couple of days time out from work ... just as well, it's a busy weekend upcoming. You'll possibly have the delights of a barefoot skiiing competition, a carnival parade, an art exhibition (bought a couple of pix last week, a snip, original, watercolours), pavement art and a sandcastle building competition. A Coronation Street star switched on the Mablethorpe Illuminations last Sunday but I was spared the ordeal - spared cos 1. it was at 9.45 pm and 2. it was raining cats and dogs. We seem to have suffered the chucking it down weather just as the flowers are at their bloomiest, all those lovely delicate petals and they get bombarded! I wonder if my 'gladdies' are still standing? I thought I'd added a photograph here .... durn it! OK, gotta zoommmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Bellys of the balls! The curvaceous cuties of Louth, left to right Miss Pam, MissTrixie, Miss Veronique, Miss Fifi, Miss Fanny and Miss Monique, literally a bouncing bevy of beauties since when they are not in their party best, they are the bouncers of Louth; doormen at Kai's and Samue'ls! A hot spot for night life, - hence paucity of garments the Golden Fleece pub put on a special Caribbean evening and the lads, for yes, they really are blokes, helped celebrate the birthday of the owner of the pub's owner,
The girls complained bitterly about disquieted nether regions, unused as they are to the floss effect of thongs. Throwing her handbag over her shoulder Miss Monique said, "We dress up every year for the craic; to show just how normal we are."
Tossing their manes, the girls made a grand entrance into to the bar to hoots for the toots and did what every bunch of girls does ... danced around their handbags.
In truth they line up as Christian Stevenson, Marcus Chamberlain, M C Securities, Mark Randall, Steve Dunkin, licensee of Samuel's Nightclub - Ian Jacklin, and Christopher Dunkin.  

Presque Nue Lingerie, in New Street, Louth with everyday to designer luxury underwear for all ladies' sizes and a range of sensory aromatherapy products.
Owned by Julie and Richard Sharp, the shop is open Monday to Saturday, 9am to 5.30pm. (01507) 600050.
Underwear modelled by Sophie Halmshaw (24) of Catwalk Agency, Leeds. 

Thank you, Postie!!

Well, how much more accommodating can the Postie get? I was out today when the mail was delivered ... didn't think I had any and was expecting some photographs. I did actually call Bonusprint but they'd given up for the day. However, my Postie wasn't discouraged by my not being in ... he posted 'em through the window!!! :)

Well, these have all come along nicely. Not sure how long it'll be before the toms ripen up though. I've got two cherry tom plants in the hanging baskets and the tall ones each now have 5 sets of flowers so it's time to top 'em off. I wonder how adie's are doing? Looking at the plants I seem to have a penchant for purple this year! 

Took two to strap me in! I never realised I was so short. Maybe they were both very tall? Yeah, that must be it! AND I was wearing 2" heels! 

Up up and awayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy Pyk in playpen!! 

Bondage

I'm going to be harnessed again!!!!
I've mentioned naturism in passing. That I sleep pj-less is just that it's more comfortable. However, there's a standing joke with some of the imaging dept since one morning, awoken from my slumbers and asked if I could nip out for a job I replied, "I haven't got me knickers on yet!" (mixing my southern dulcet tones with northern colloquialism).
Yesterday morning I had a breakfast job and, unusally for me, was wearing a skirt. It's a bit harder (for me) to make people smile when I'm half asleep but as I was talking to this group, camera trained on them I mentioned the little story above.
I listened to a phone message just before I went to bed and ended up hooting with laughter.
Today I'm to go to the same company (Luxus Limited) to take a shot of as many employees as they can muster for a group shot. I suggested yesterday that they get a ladder for me (5ft tall isn't a very good vantage point - I get a lot of sky or ceiling if I don't stand on something).
The call was from Brenda, the MD's secretary, who could hardly contain her laughter. She said they will be providing me with a loader, that I have to be hard hatted and harnessed and it might be a good idea for me to wear trousers but if I wear a skirt can I remember to wear my knickers.
But on the other hand (she's bubbling over with laughter by now) if I forget it might be good for company morale!
I'll try to remember to take my small camera and see if someone can catch a shot of me up in the air!
I did suggest to the boss that this one might be worth a little more, payment wise (well, my feet will be leaving the ground!) and he skillfully avoided the issue.

Ohhhh, woe. Invitation to a Pity Party.

I really do need to get to grip with my accounts. When I suggested to the accountant that I should be able to claim a proportion of my rent (just because I wanted to!) he said no.
Now I read in the Writers’ and Artists’ Year Book that if work is conducted at home, a deduction for ‘use of home is usually allowed …. Reasonable …. Appropriate proportion of the totals … costs of rent, light heat ….’
Rewind, rewind, did I just read rent there??
So I read on. It had been suggested to me by a colleague that ‘computers’ could be claimed 100% in the first year for someone doing what I’m doing. Accountant said no. However this ‘ere book says: Expenditure on IT for the purposes of the business now benefits from a special 100% allowance in the year of purchase.”
Rewind, rewind. 100% allowance, eh?
I already know my rent wasn’t apportioned. Do I really want to look at my last submitted year’s accounts and see if my computer was 100% allowed? Could anything be done in retrospect anyway since the IR paid back all the tax I’d paid the previous year.
Or will I just get very, very annoyed thinking of the amount I paid the accountants last year, which was 3 times the previous year’s amount because I didn’t make the time (didn’t have the time) to put the various expenditures in Excel in columns, pre-added up.
If I’d just dumped a box of unsorted receipts on ‘em I could understand it but they were all sorted chronologically and attached to the statements and highlighted as business expenses.
Should I have taken someone who wears Mickey Mouse ties seriously?
No I don’t want to look at the accounts again, I didn’t want to look at them the first bloody time!
All they’ll tell me is that I need to get a proper job! That somehow, very likely through dint of hard work and not having a life (where does one ‘get a life’?) that I managed to break even.
Now I’ve got my lovely new camera I don’t even know that I want to carry on taking pictures!!! But I do know that though I could brush up my secretarial skills that I don’t want to be within the confines of four walls 9-5pm.
My last career change just happened. I wonder what’s going to happen next.
I’ve never really planned much in my life, except to have the babies, which eventually happened.
I did apply for teacher training as a ‘mature’ student aged 22. The kybosh was put on that by my confidence being undermined by my boss at the time, who didn’t want to lose a good secretary (whom he fancied the pants off) so he wrote in his reference for me … “is not suited to working with children.”
Now, you wouldn’t think he’d tell me that, would you? No, he didn’t. What he did do was put the reference in the out tray for mailing – so I read it!
Which did, at least, stand me in good stead for the interview.
Interviewer: Do you think you would be suited to working with children??
Me: Yes, I would be suited to working with children because ….
(that’s how one was taught to reply for examinations)
What happened? I was offered a position at Teacher Training College J
Did I take it up???
Noooooooo, cos da boss worked on my mind … how OLD I would be, how I would SO out of place …. Etc etc.
So that was one plan that went awry, huh?
This ‘career’ just happened by default.
So now I’m doing something that I don’t actually have ANY qualifications for .. on paper. Hang on … I’ve got tons IN the paper.
I’ve made the job my job … but can I ‘port’ my job elsewhere? This is my pond.
Now, ‘my ladies’, bless ‘em all have held my hand and doled out ‘purple power’ by the bucketful and been supportive but where to from here?
My genes are ‘outing’ maybe. My maiden name suggests that writing is in t’blood. Rimmer from Middle German Rhymer (or some such, I forget) meaning poet or writer.
So I’ve got these genes trying to burst out of me, which makes a change from me bursting out of my jeans and I’m not sure where to channel it.
Here’s a good a place as any to talk to myself.
AND when is my bodyclock going to get normal and I’ll sleep when others do and not be going to bed when the birdies are waking up?
I feel bright and chirpy … untrue … I feel wide awake, forget bright and chirpy, cos I feel grouchy and confused and frustrated.
And ohhhhhhhhhhhhh, how good it would be to put my head on someone’s shoulder and just share this and get a hug and a cup of tea. Not answers, because it’s not that easy.
I was told tomorrow’s another day.
It won’t be like yesterday and it won’t be like tomorrow (which we know never comes) but I suppose I can look forward to one day the light dawning?
Have you read Homer’s The Iliad? The phrase: “And dawn came with rosie fngers,” fascinated me.
Made me think of a couple of gals turning up at a party.
I think the above has been a pity party. But it was mine and I enjoyed it!

Osmosis

I was quite surprised when my daughter, Tora, made a dress. To my knowledge she’d never had a needlework lesson in her life. Her housemistress showed the girls a bit of cooking and possibly some sewing but she was learning academic things. Whereas I, C stream grammar should probably really have gone to a tech college cos I’m soooo hands on. I had sewing lessons and learned diligently.
So I asked Tor where she had learned to sew and she told me she watched me! That came as a surprise. I was never aware that I was watched. I examined the dress, all the little things like cutting V’s into arcs so the material would lay (lie?) well, all there. I was very proud of her.
Today I was attempting to sunbathe and the little boy next door was busy hammering and sawing.
I looked over and he was trying to saw with the wood on the floor, holding up one end, and using a hack saw.
Nope, that wasn’t right. So I gave him my saw and I suggested he get the stool in the yard and use it as a saw horse. Nah, put your knee on the wood, to pinion it. OK.
Me head down back on sunbed. Hmm, the sound wasn’t right. Hey, S, you need to use long strokes. Better, but not right. OK, use a stronger stroke on the backward pull, S.
Then it occurred to me where the heck was this all coming from?? Osmosis, I used to watch my Daddy, a joiner, when I was a tot. He was only in our midst until I was 7 so I suppose I took it in at an early age.
Been quiet, me, a couple of days. I’ve been sorting the insurance and getting a new camera and flash unit. I’m absolutely thrilled with it but yesterday morning when I called the insurance for confirmation of acceptance of claim on the camera, too and was told they hadn’t received the fax and the claims assistant had been elusive all week, I just saw it drawing out further and further, with jobs I couldn’t do and promises made to and the little spare being inadequate, I just sorta quavered on the phone, wobbled, despair set in and I burst into tears!
Look, it’s like a racing driver without a car! A photographer NEEDS a camera? I, I, I, more tears.
I was told to resend the fax (it went to claim’s email), which I did, hastening down to the library to do so, and mooched around feeling full of woe and within the half hour there was a complete turnaround, call came OK-ing camera. Big smiles and all is well with the world now.
Maybe I should go on a photographic holiday and learn to use it to the best advantage?
Certainly a holiday would be a good idea, 26 days without a break, no wonder I burst into tears. Exhaustion! It’ll be over in a couple of weeks when the schools break up. Roll onnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.

Catching up - sports and todgers

Busy day today and I'm still captioning but have a little break to blog.
Started with raising the Euro Blue Flag for a clean beach/environment at Mablethorpe (one was also presented to Sutton on Sea) and a Seaside Award.
I popped a little sign in my car, which a nice man in a shop in Alford made for me, one day a while back, when the traffic warden was about and I had to park on 'yellows' for a wee whilie. It a piece of cardboard on which he stencilled "PRESS on call" and he stuck one of my cards on it and drew a border around the whole. What a nice man ... I only popped in is shop to ask where somewhere was!
Don't know if it would have been of any use, a yella's a yella, innit?
Had a quick mooch (can you mooch quickly?) around town, got the papers to see how many piccies I had in this week (mwah mwah Mr Editor), then it was time for next job, a King Edward VI Grammar School orchestra rehearsal for the end of term concert and some littlies from St Michael's who were joining in, in the percussion section. Course, to get by I had to ask the biggest instrument in the orchestra to excuse me. Blooming 'eck, that double bass is bigger than I am!
Came home for an hour to caption then I ended up with a sporty evening.
Clay pigeon shoot for paper and social pix.
Champion darts player, Bobby George playing at the Turk's Head which is helping Dave Custons raise money for Action Medical Research.
On to Monks' Dyke Technology College PE Dept Presentation of Awards evening with guest speaker, Premiership Referee Neale Barry, then around 9.15 on to
Kenwick Park Hotel East Lincs Combination Football AGM to take pix of award winners.
Just done a 'phew' like a horse does, with wobbly vibrating lips.
The last three were rather nice, really. Cos people actually called me Julie, as opposed to my local nickname of 'Scoop', which means that I'm a real person, too, to some people!
The footie one was fun. They stopped the whole proceedings of the AGM when I arrived and about 100 pairs of eyes swivelled toward me when my arrival was announced and there were lots of grins and winks and nods (no reason for the winks and nods, behave yourself!) from the guys, some of whom I've photographed during the course of work.
One of the biggest beams came from my erstwhile divorce solicitor! He did a double take ... I tend to forget I've lost a couple of stones (28lbs) or more since I consulted him over three years ago. He asked how I was and I said happiest ever I've been. Which was true at that moment cos it was nice having so many guys smiling at me :)
I've had some fun doing the footie pix. There's always 'one'. Usually the one with lots of gel on his hair (in any given team), who wants to do a moonie (and does) or hold his jewels in the picture, or make bunny ears over someone else's head.
At one match I went to, the changing hut was some distance from the pitch and just before taking the picture and game started on this very cold afternoon, guys dashed to the edge of the field, with their backs to me and steam rose around them. Do I have to explain?
One guy (the 'one')however, went into the goalmouth and seemed to be adjusted his 'dress' (with back to me). I thought that wasn't very clever, really, cos if he was peeing in there, his own goalie was going to have to jump or land in it during one half of the game.
So I got them lined up, footie team style, back row had their arms behind their backs and I looked along the front line, making sure they all had the same knee down. I was concentrating on knees down.
After taking the picture one of the guys on the sidelines was helping me with names and while doing so his team mates drifted over, one at a time, to request to see the photo on the LCD screen. Which was a little unusual for so many to want to see it.
Got home, got the piccies uploaded and lobbed 'em off swiftly to the paper.
Relaxing and reviewing I went hot and cold and my hair stood on end.
The 'one' had not adjusted his clothing at all, he was exposing himself and looking at the three pix I'd taken (to make sure that one of them was good), from one to three his todger had grown like topsy!!!
Make a hasty call to the paper to ask 'em to digitise a todger!
I was just getting into this post but a friend has called (midnight) and asked me to collect her from hospital A&E ... since I was the one that phoned an ambulance to take her there an hour ago, I'd better jump in the car (with no decent radio ...) and fetch her back home!!!!

Naked Human Art

Anyone one to be part of a naked human art project in Gateshead at the weekend?? There may just be time to register Spencer Tunick The artist, "Creates a temporary site-specific landscapes that can involve up to several thousand nude figures arranged in public places, Tunick’s site-specific installations follow on the tradition of land art. Working directly in the landscape, the artist uses the nude body as raw material to intervene and transform a chosen site, documenting the installations with photography and video which he then exhibits in a gallery context." It says. I looked at a work he produced in Finland and it put me in mind of a naturist yoga session I once attended. I was in the back row ... I figured I could shut my eyes to avoid the view in front of me and preferred that to being in the front row and the idea of everyone behind me staring at, well, what they'd be staring at ......

Insurance

You won’t remember about when my car was 6 months old and it was hit by a guy driving a car with no brakes, who had no insurance or licence, will you?

I actually had the nouse (or is that nowse?) to take his photograph, not thinking of course that he could quite easily have ripped the camera from my hand and jumped on it … but I suppose that would have been a little suspicious.

Instead, he gave me his name and address and even offered his birthday.

I took the picture, anyway, mainly because my camera bag was sitting on the front seat of the car and it suddenly occurred to me so to do. If I’d remembered, I could have used the instant camera in the glove compartment which came as a pressie (hah £2.50 pressie with a £7.5k car J )

When I hadn’t heard from the guy after a few days I went down to the local police station and asked what the procedure was. Should I have heard from him? So they looked up the address, which was non-existent and looking up the car reg said it had been found abandoned the day after the accident. I toodled off home and returned with a CD of the perp’s photographs – from which he was recognised.

A couple of weeks later I was told he’d done the same thing to someone else and was languishing on holiday care of Her Majesty but they’d get him when he came out. OH YEAH?

I contacted the insurers, of course and on finding out the guy was in prison, they said they couldn’t pay out on my £500 claim because they wouldn’t get their money back and sent a letter to that effect.

Which, you can imagine, upset little Pyk. So I phoned the insurers, explained I was unhappy and that I worked for a newspaper and I thought that insurers not paying out would make a jolly good story! To which they replied …. Oh, we didn’t mean that, of course we’ll pay for the damage to your car, we just won’t pay the excess … when did an insurance company EVER pay the excess?

Hmm, still haven't got a new aerial by the way, don't think I'll bother claiming on the insurance.

Today my camera jumped out of my bag.

I almost never, OK, hardly ever, travel with it with flash unit attached. I take it to pieces, stow it carefully in the case and zip it up (cos it has landed once or twice, after a rather abrupt halt, in the passenger well, ahem).

This morning I had thoughts about broken cameras.

Don’t ever have thoughts about bad things, people.

I had a large group of youngsters, teens, to photograph and they all wanted to be on the back row, all 50 of them, so they took a little sorting out, which made me late for the next job, at a technology school, so I just put the whole kit and caboodle in my bag, dashed off to the next venue, grabbed my bag by the strap, jumped out of the car and the camera jumped out of the case, crashing onto the concrete, dislodging and breaking the flash unit's shoe thingy.

I managed by using the teeny flash on the camera but hiked it down to the school’s tech dept and there a very nice man (Steve Cade) glued the broken bit back on.

However the unit was not working so I called the insurers who took all details, of course and called me back to say it wasn’t insured for business use, only personal, UNLESS I could persuade them that I had taken out business insurance in which case they would alter the policy and pay up.

That sounds strange, doesn’t it? Like they knew something I didn't but weren't going to tell?

I had to go through all of this a couple of times with a claims assistant and she told me that I had not declared it was for business use.

I pointed out that for 'occupation' I had stated Press Photographer and for 'business' I had stated Publishing-media. Therefore I thought that they might have noticed that a camera body valued at £2000 would very likely be linked to my job and not a thing I would have tried to hide. HUH?

The lady was adamant that I couldn’t have answered the questions truthfully. Which I wasn’t very pleased with, either.
I argued my case logically (unusual for me) so she finally looked back and found that I had in fact insured for business originally but they hadn’t picked it up for the two following years.

Thus the claim would stand BUT they would acquire the audio tapes from two years ago to listen to the telephone conversation I had with them.

Which seemed a pointless exercise if they actually had paperwork anyway proving my point.

Then, since they decided to be nice because I hadn’t lied, they said they would expedite the issuing of permission to buy new unit if I’d like to send them a fax, since it was all now rather urgent.

I travelled 20 miles for a quote to fax and telephoned, as requested, to say I had sent the document to Michelle.

“OH Michelle? She hasn’t been in for two days, I don’t know if she’s sick or on holiday, tell you what, ring tomorrow to see if anyone’s reading her emails”– which the fax apparently went to.

This was for speedy service?

The camera shop can’t get the unit until Thursday, I can’t get it until Friday and tomorrow I’m working from 9.45 am til 9.45pm taking pix, without a flash unit.

Had I gone in half an hour before I could have had the camera shop's last unit.
Had I gone in 10 mins before I could have bought an almost new camera body for half it’s original price but they were giving someone two days to make up his mind if he wanted it.

I said I’m here, now, with the money.

No, they didn’t want to renege on their offer to a very good customer. (Very good on their part).

But did they have to tell me??? I get first dibs on the camera if the guy doesn't want it, but of course they'll tell him there's someone waiting to snap it up and he'll say that HE wants it!

I hope they do get the unit in before Sunday! I’ve got a ‘summer ball’ on Saturday (evening dress optional) with a survivors' breakfast and have to go to the church and take a picture at 9.50am the next morning, of the congregation, from the pulpit. I REALLY need the flash unit for that.

I won't be able to tell if the focus is fuzzy or my eyes are fuzzy!

Sorry this is a boring one. Just something I needed to say!!

Get the Massage?

I was just chatting to a friend (simply a friend!) on a dating site, when I was interrupted by a guy ‘whispering’ to me (a form of contact), who was determined to get the level of conversation to base zero.

I’m so blooming polite I replied, ignoring where he was trying to lead but still somehow managed to talk about massage (I was talking reflexology, he wasn’t) and erotic photography (him, not me!). I finally told him I just wasn’t going where he was trying to lead and told him I was ending the conversation … in response to his asking if I massaged myself … I did say he could massage his big toe for a headache.

Oh, I hope he didn’t think that was a euphemism!!!

So that reminded me of a time I was going to write an article about different types of massage.

I’d been to ‘naice’ ladies’ beauty parlours (of course) and had massages, Oh and I had a naturist masseur once, who massaged au naturel, I mean he was au naturel, as well as myself.

Actually he was very good and after I’d been to a McTimoney Chiropractor for a (very) bad back (my leg kept collapsing – no it wasn’t just me bending my knee), I’d been even worse the next day. So I called the naturist masseur (who I knew from the naturist club …) and hobbled around to his place, with a stick (yep, pyk wiv stick) and asked him to concentrate on the sore spot.

He relieved the pain no end. His coup de grace was, I’m sure, what probably fixed the problem altogether cos I think it stretched me and possibly untrapped the nerve which had been giving me gyp but the way he did it was a bit unusual. Standing, after the massage, he told me to link my hands behind his neck (yeah, yeah) and just dangle .. so I did - fortunately, so did he!

I suppose you’re visualising this??? LOL. It was all very proper nonetheless.

British Naturism More on this another time!

I think I digressed.

So, I’d had various forms of massage and a new massage parlour had opened in Grimsby. Someone at the paper suggested I go have a look see. So I did.

The first thing that perturbed me a little was the fact that the solid door had a spyhole in it, you know, like a peephole for when you want to see who’s outside.

I rang the bell and was admitted. In the waiting room … previously I’d been used to white coated, hair pinned up ladies in nice white overalls, with pastel walls and nice reception office furniture … there was a shag pile (stop laughing!), deep blue carpet, a white leather sofa and green painted walls and the ‘receptionist’ arrived wearing a grubby, flimsy petticoat.

I knew I was on iffy ground somehow. However, I made polite enqiries.
What type of massage do you practice? (y’know Swedish, etc etc)
Just a massage.
Erm is it a particular type?
Just a massage.
Hmmm, how long does it last?
About half an hour.
For how much?
Forty pounds.
Half an hour for £40?
Well, you can have longer if you want.
Hmmm, is the manager here?
(Manager appears 5 mins later)
She is dressed in what looks like a hastily pulled on track suit, one eye in the pot, the other up the chimney and her hair sorta flat one side and standing up, looking like it had mousse in it on the other side.
Have you seen that film??? Was it ‘Something About Mary’???
I beat a hasty retreat, saying I’d think about it.

The endings

I've got two films to watch before tomorrow night ... anyone want to give me the ending and save me 5 hrs??? A Very Long Engagement and Vera Drake! Actually, I think I'll just have an orgy of film watching tomorrow. Monday is a sort of weekend day for me. Not sure if the first film is in French. It's directed by the same guy who made Amelie, one of my favourite filums. Last night I watched Intimate Strangers, that was French, too. I do so enjoy the foreign films. Well, I suppose American is foreign but I don't like noisy, car chasing, gun toting, people-hitting films. A good cry over a film is a jolly good way of allowing oneself to weep, though and it doesn't matter.

TANK YOU: Funds were raised for the Royal British Legion and 20 local pensioners enjoyed a street party at the Axe & Cleaver in North Somercotes.
Other entertainment featured an across the ages military/40's fancy dress competion, a WWII quiz and music from the 40's of WWII songs for a singalong, in the evening.
Gary Spencer (far right), a collector of military memorabilia drove his 1964 Abbott SPG to the Axe & Cleaver to add to the occasion.
A member of the Invicta Military Vehicle Preservation Society (IMPS - www.imps.org.uk), Gary added some interesting facts about the vehicle. Its maximum speed is 30mph and at that speed takes 300 yards to stop.
Those wishing to purchase such a vehicle should bear in mind that it does 1 to 3 miles to the gallon of petrol! However, no special licence is needed to drive it on the roads!
A tracked vehicle, it could be one way of getting to the front of a summer holiday traffic jam!
 

Now, how's this for blog interaction??? The little cutie with the kiss curl is a wee bit bigger and the curl's gone but he's still got those chubby cheeks, no wonder he was a prize winner! Any more pix for the nostalgia spot?? 

Oh, the one below in yellow top and purple skirt ... great colours, huh? That was the 'Mod' look at 16. Despite the look I had managed to get a boyfriend! Riding on a donkey ... first holiday abroad. Benidorm. Aged, hmmm, 17 or 17? Wish I had that waistline now! My hair had just been cut by a Spanish barber. It was already short but on the beach one day an 'old' man who'd nodded and smiled daily was beckoning to me and making snipping motions. He waved for me to follow him. So of course I did. The way you do (if you're me). It turned out he was a local barber. He sat me in the chair and gave me yet another haircut. I think it was a bit unusual to have such short hair then, maybe he just thought it amusing to cut a girl's hair. Maybe my previous cut was just plain awful? Anyway, I didn't have to pay and until the end of the holiday he'd appear by the beach and smile and wave. OK, end of nostalgia! 

Getting more growed up here! Tom boy aged 11. This was my favourite woolly. I used to tear around the village (Laceby) on my red bike and was always taking it to pieces. I went flying around a corner one day and a wheel fell off - obviously didn't tighten it enough. The mudgard got scratched so I found a small tin of red paint and prised the lid off with a screwdriver. Unfortunately red paint spilled over my hands and woolly. I didn't think mum would be very happy about this so tried to sneak past her, doubled up. All she saw was me, bent double with red stuff dripping from my fingers. She thought I'd been stabbed. Far from being relieved, for some she yelled at me! Why do parents yell at kids when they're happy they're alive?? When I was about 4 I was allowed to have a bath alone. I was lying there, ears under the water, listening to the glug glug sound in my ears, eyes wide open, having a lovely time and the next thing I knew ... Mum was looming over me, looking somewhat alarmed and once again I was airborne, she'd grabbed my arm and I was getting a slapping. I gather now she thought I was dead! I sing in the bath now ... that was the order ... if I was to bath alone in future I had to keep making a noise so she knew I was alive. 

Were these people very very tall or was I very very short? I hid my hands because I wasn't wearing little white gloves like all the other bridesmaids - couldn't find a pair, my hands were too small. I carried the train. Hmm, well I supposed to. I recall walking down the aisle but everything around was sooo interesting and next thing I knew I was flying through the air. I'd stood on the train, the bride was brought to an abrupt halt, she tugged I went head over heels. 

A little nostalgia - nope, not a Shirley Temple lookalike. Mum was a hairdresser and used to perm my hair. I hated it, hurt like hell when it was combed. One day I decided to cut my fringe but it wasn't straight, so I carried on cutting til there was no fringe (bangs). I wasn't allowed to play with scissors after that. 

Ah bless - takes me back to the family album and my bruvver! 

Celebrating 60 years of peace - St Michael's Church of England School, Louth. Pupils really got into the swing of it! A tea party with jam, cheese, corned beef and spam sandwiches followed by ice cream and jelly. They searched the internet to find out about life 60 years ago, chatted with WWII Veterans, went to the Lincolnshire Life Museum, watched videos and news reels to bring history alive. The staff also dressed for the occasion including hairstyle and seamed stockings. The Headteacher's cane was only a prop, by the way!! 

Immediate Remedial Action

That's what the plant book advice that I should take with the Ficus Benjamina. It's now in the nursery - ok, my bedroom ... erk, I hope it's not true about plants taking up all the oxygen at night, else I might wake up dead one morning!!! I bought a bigger pot and have put in some nice new nutritious soil and will keep an eye on it.
There's not really space in there for it and I'm going to have to move it each time I want to look in my perfume box, which I suppose it won't like, either!
Just in case it dies .. I bought a Sch, schleff, an umbrella plant growing up a moss pole to put in its place in the sitting room. I'm used to catching sight of the ficus, though, out of the corner of my eye and it's a tad disconcerting.
I thought maybe I should let Somerfield know about their cold shop by the way (there is supposed to be a link for feedback and comments on their shops) but I'll durned if I could get their site to come up, kept getting 'can't find page'.
Somerfield If anyone gets it, can you just mention my prob??? Just give 'em a link to this site, :)

Wheelbarrows

As she wheeled her wheelbarrow, through the streets broad and narrow, she cried cockles and mussels, alive alive ohhhhhhhhh.
There's something going on with wheelbarrows in Theddlethorpe! Whether there's an excess of barrows, or it's full of builders living there I don't know but wheelbarrows seem to be de rigeur for floral ornamentation on the front verge! Those not in possession of a wheelbarrow have substituted a dustbin (garbage bin) and something that looks like the old fashioned (until cases with wheels attached came in) suitcase wheelie thingy, with a plant holder attached.
So, what's this mystery? I had a programme for an upcoming village flower show, possibly it was for Theddlethorpe but I've hunting around for it and can't find now. Dang, maybe there was a 'Wicked Wheels' floral entry? I don't mean just one or two wheelbarrows I mean EIGHT wheelbarrows in the space of about 400 yards!!!!
It's wheely quite a mystery.
Intrepid investigator Pyk will have to be sent into action!
Ah, just before I press 'publish'. I've got a grouse!
Somerfields Supermarket in Louth is too bloody cold!
I went in dressed for summer ... this is the second time this has happened in a couple of weeks ... and it's sooooo cold in there that by the time I get to the check out I'm clumsy from the chill and in a foul mood. NOW, you know Pyk's a happy bunny and doesn't get in foul moods easily ... just little strops ... but it really was COLD! I was glad to see another lady shivering in the aisles, too. Standing there rubbing her arms, teeth chattering.
I'm going to the Co-op next time!
Oh yes, when I first moved to Louth I asked someone where the nearest supermarket was and she told me to go to "****" ... ah, that isn't a rude word, I just can't remember the name of the shop (enlighten me?). Anyway, I searched high and low for this place and the only shop I could find in the general direction in which I'd been pointed was The Co-op, which seemed OK, so of course I went in there. It turned out that the Co-op was the shop I was directed to, it's just that it's still known by it's previous owners name by many in the town, regardless of the fact that it it changed hands YEARS AGO!
Have I got anything else to say???
Yes!
Night night! :)

Musings

I’ve killed off my weeping fig. It’s always easy to tell the state of my life by my plants. When they’re luxuriant, shiny of leaf and in flower then Pyk’s a happy bunny. Conversely, when they’re dead, wilting, surrounded by weeds and covered in dust, then Pyk is frazzled, things on her mind or unhappy.
I think I’ve had a weeping fig in my life for the last 10 years … maybe it’s time for a change? It was actually the only indoor plant I’ve had for the last 3 and a half years … I’ve tended to look after the patch outside but even that went to pot until a month or two back. However all is blooming outdoors and the toms very sneakily grew some additional spurs down at the bottom and there was me tweaking ‘em out higher up! I think I took my own advice of nipping out the new shoots a little too well on the miniature toms in hanging baskets. Think I’ve nipped out the main spur. However the up side of that is that that I won’t be having to eat green chutney ‘til it’s coming out of my ears!
There’s always a silver lining to Pyk’s clouds!
I’m feeling guilty about the fig now! I took it thro to the back yard, leaves dropping off all along the way and left it out in the rain. Awww, Jules, you shouldn’t have done that, it doesn’t like being in the rain and cold! Maybe I’ll get a bigger pot tomorrow, cut it back a little and give it some nice new soil and apologise for being a bad mummy??
Tora’s got her house, yippeeeeee! Maybe I’ll drop the bombshell about visiting her now?? Yak yak yak! Well, not NOW, immediately, this moment … but at some time in the future.
Chatting to the vicar tonight in t’pub I said I had a free day upcoming and he suggesting jumping on a plane at Humberside Airport and taking a trip to Amsterdam for the day. Maybe I’ll look see the fares??? Not with him, I hasten to add! Not that there’s anything wrong with him … just that that wasn’t the suggestion. Throw the spade away Jules!
Scrap that idea …. Day trips just aren’t cheap at the moment. Maybe I’ll just jump in the car and go ……….. somewhere! Anyone want to come out and play?
Just realised I’ve developed a dual personality in this post.
OK, I suppose someone’s gonna do a Freud on me?
How, when there’s plenty around me to do can I be feeling like I need a project?

Theddlethorpe Gala Day

A couple of jobs today before my enthusiasm to work waned and a strong desire to soak up the sun, relax and not work, as most other people do on a Sunday, overtook me. Theddlethorpe held a village gala and were entertained with fast races -- kiddies running, slow races --- kiddies cycling, demonstrations by the Mablethorpe Shotakan Karate Club and also by Alford Morris.

Who aren't called Morris Men cos there's some women there, too! I've put a link in ... you have to read it for the amusement value. It HAS to have been written by the Morris' 'Bagman', one Mr Patrick Purves (playing the melodian - not an accordian) who has a rather well-known sister. Words must run in the family ......

Many a true word is spoken in jest!

When I headed the last post 'Back in Harness' I wasn't thinking I actually would be but you'll see from the photographs below when I was at the Lincolnshire Gliding Club there I was strapped into a parachute and then into the plane harness. I was lucky enough to have two flights, the first at the rear of the pilot and then in the front. Got a lovely cup of tea, too! It's great soaring so quietly, there's so much to take in my head needed to be on a swivel. Vertically challenged, sitting down, too, I had to hold the camera up to the perspex 'lid' (there must be a technical term) or the small sliding window opending and just pop shots off hoping I'd get some good pictures. Also visited Elsie Bette who gave me a demonstration of tatting. Elsie was using the finest thread and the Lord knows how she managed to see the tiny stitches - I had difficulty threading a needle a couple of weeks back. I took a photograph of Elsie with family, a 102nd birthday piccie. The arts & crafts exhibition at Withern Methodist Church was interesting, too. I do wish I had more time to stay and try out some of the activities. But then again ... I did fly!!!

Pyk being strapped into a parachute 

Erm, Derek tightening the parachute! 

My pilot Derek Woodforth, back seat driver - PYK! I did get second flight, in the front with the joystick waggling twixt my legs! 

View over Woodthorpe Hall Golf Course, fishing pond, campsite and Garden Centre, in the distance the wind turbines (can't be far enough away for me, they gimme creeps) and then out toward Mablethorpe and the sea 

Pilot & Pyk mirrored in dials - we're really flyin' here! 

Back in Harness

Had a fun time in Essex. Zoomed down to the A1 via Horncastle (going through New York!) and Peterborough and it was a two and three quarter hour journey, arrived about 7pm. An old friend, Peter, put on a murder mystery play where peeps sit at tables, have a few nibbles and discuss among themselves and then with the cast ‘whodunnit’. I changed my mind twice, the last time deciding that ‘Brian dun it’ but since we’d all discounted him we went with the consensus. Guess what? He did!! It was good fun. Yesterday had been busy and I hadn’t had time to eat so the nibbles were welcome but I’d have devoured a take away as well if we’d got to one before they all shut! Similar timing on the return route but a different one, up the A1 via Newark and Lincoln. Afraid I put my foot down a bit, as did others, as we hit the motorway stretch near Peterborough and as people shuffled for places we were all going a bit fast. I’m hoping that the policeman with a speed gun was concentrating on the zoomers in the outside lane and not those (me) just using speed as a tool to get into a comfortable position. That all I was doing occifer!!! I’m off now to take a picture of a local lady who’s 102, a craft day in Withern and possibly visit the gliding club’s open weekend. That’s on tomorrow too, but tomorrow’s already quite full, so we’ll see!!! I had a flight last year. The weather isn’t at it’s best today for flying, patchy sunshine, so the gliders won’t fly so high and the view won’t be so good.Vroom vroom ……

Faggots

Here they are, with one cut so you can see the consistency. Yum. Lunch.

No riots but a little disruption!

Today is Global White Band Day and around the world people are wearing their white bands to show support for the campaign to Make Poverty History. The UK is hosting the G8 Summit in Edinburgh and members of King Edward VI Grammar School, Louth, Edward's Theatre Company showed their support by dressing in white, performing as statues. One young lady was a real traffic stopper - literally. No, Jenny, the traffic warden wasn't really booking her!!

WOW! It's July already!!!

Where did the year go?? That's all ...

Make Poverty History

© Julie Coates, 2005.

WHITE'S ALRIGHT: Oxfam's Make Poverty History Campaign promises a 'white out' in shops throughout the country on July 1, the day before the G8 Rally in Edinburgh.
The co-ordinator of the Campaign in Louth, Tina Speck is pictured with a selection of white clothes, in the shop, from which Louth's King Edward VI Grammar School pupils will be selecting outfits to wear on the day, posing as statues.
So if they're rioting, they'll be doing it standing still. I think Louth can forget about battening the hatches and boarding up the windows, unlike Edinburgh. At least until the pubs chuck out at night!